“My name is Kate Barron-Avillion.  Two and a half years ago I lost my husband, Ron, to Leukemia.  He had just turned 40 years old.  This was obviously a devastating loss for me and Ron’s family, but especially for our son Gabriel who was not quite 9 years old at the time.  Shortly after Ron died, several people encouraged me to contact Tides, a local support program for grieving families.  Gabe and I reluctantly attended our first Tides group just a month or so after Ron died. We were received with such kindness and support we continued attending for the next year and a half.

           Tides became a safe haven for Gabe and I to talk, or not talk, but rather listen to others talk about, loss and what that meant for each of us and our families.  It was often difficult, but it was a shared difficulty, which when grieving, is critical.  Gabe found the groups to be especially helpful.  They often focused on expression through play and creation.   Gabe was always eager to find out what activity was planned for each meeting, and I was always amazed at what the children created–sometimes sad, mostly joyful, but always memorable.

           Much attention was paid by the staff at Tides to the needs of not only the specific ages of the children, but to the specific loss of the family–whether it be spouse, parent or child.  Great effort was made to group the adults and children in a way that was the most therapeutic–this is no small task when dealing with such profound loss.  These efforts were not lost on me and I am so grateful for the sensitivity each staff member showed me and Gabe during our attendance at Tides.

           Tides became a family for me and Gabe at a time when our family was most fractured.  The value of this was, and continues to be, immeasurable.  While we have stopped attending Tides as our lives have moved beyond acute grief, we know that should we ever need the support of this very special family, it is there.  And for that we are so grateful.”
–Kate Barron-Avillion

“My name is Renee L. Kelley, I have 3 beautiful children ages 12, 8 & 6.  We have been attending Tides over the past year.  Five years ago, my husband passed away, leaving my children & I devastated.  For 4 years, we had not been involved in any type of grief support.  We then experienced another loss in our lives, which directed me towards looking for support.  Thankfully, with the encouragement of others, I contacted the Tides program.

            You see, my husband committed suicide; therefore his last act was looked down on by so many people.  All of a sudden the person that he was when he was with us was no longer. It was his final choice that stuck in the minds of those around us.  Being the loved ones left behind, the death itself was hard to accept, but the cause of death brought a whole new challenge.  Family and friends in their own grieving did not know how to respond, it was easier for people to ignore the situation.  I felt so abandoned and alone.
I knew the children and I needed something more to come to a closure and the second loss we had led me in that direction, so I reluctantly called Tides.  As I was talking, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders; I knew this is what my children needed.  Little did I know this program wasn’t just for my children, but it was a healing process for me as well.  Our first night at Tides was an amazing night, we felt so loved.  Every person involved was so compassionate & very concerned for the children and me.  The kids were able to share memories about their Dad and it made them (and me) feel so good to be able to talk about him and the special person he was to us without feeling like he or we were being judged.  The way I perceive it, is that sometimes people make bad choices and innocent people suffer for them.  Unfortunately, my husband’s bad choice was final.  The Tides program has brought a lot of freedom to our hearts.  It has taken away the sting of death and has helped me to see that it doesn’t matter what or how it happened, the bottom line is we were left behind with a loss.  To us, it was a huge loss and Tides was there to support us in our healing process.

           The Tides staff and volunteers have laughed with us and cried with us.  They have become like family.  They supported my daughter with tears in their eyes as she sang in a talent show.  At the ropes course, they encouraged us as we climbed 30 feet up a tree and walked a highwire.  We had so much fun that day, it seemed like we didn’t have a care in the world as we laughed and cried with them.  It was an amazing experience for me and amazing to see my children be so brave.

           The love, support, self-esteem and encouragement we have received with Tides has been a priceless experience.  We are so thankful for the beautiful people we have come to know through the Tides program and we are very thankful for all of those who support the Tides program to make it possible.  Your support is very much appreciated and it does not go unnoticed.  A healed child will be a healed adult, therefore making that child a better person in this world.  My children and I feel that we have been so blessed by so many wonderful people.  We know that someday because of the love and healing that we have received, we will be able to help others in their healing process as well.  Thank You!”
–Renee L. Kelley

“Instead of thinking of sad thoughts about my Dad, I think more happy thoughts when I think of my Dad at Tides.  Tides helps me to think happy thoughts about my Dad.”
–Age 13

“…the nice thing about Tides is that it’s not just for the children.”
–Parent

"The Tides program is a great organization that gets grieving families together to talk. The way it is organized by age helps each member discover that they are not alone, which makes them feel more secure about their loss."
–Age 14

“Tides is much more than just a support group for children…it gets us all out as a family unit.”
–Parent

“…well they call it Tides because sometimes the tide is high or jumpy and happy, and sometimes it’s low and sad, so we call it Tides and it’s a nice place to go to.”
–Age 9

“They can just ask you something like, like, is your life okay? And you can say, yeah! And, and you really realize, like, hey it’s okay! I’m okay!”
–Age 9

“When their father died, one of the first things that hit me was they are always going to be the kids whose dad died. That’s why Tides was so great, because they do see other children who are just like them.”
–Parent

“The children are learning constructive ways to deal with the unpleasant emotions that they have as a result of what happened to them.”
–Parent

“The closing circle is how we end our evening at Tides, and …all of us—including the staff, the volunteers, the parents, the children—we all hold hands and do a hand squeeze that goes around. It’s really just a nice way to end our evening together and symbolize our unity and that we’re in this together and going forward together.”
–Parent

“Tides doesn’t try to fix things, and we’re not counseling. It is a peer support group that allows families to come and feel safe and feel like what they are going through is okay.”
–Executive Director

“The Tides program is very kind and nice and they give you nice food and they care for you a lot and they make cool crafts after you eat.”
–Age 6

“It makes me feel happy, really good inside, and it makes me feel happy because there’s nice friends here.”
–Age 6